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Summarize and Delay

Please consider the following parable: PARABLE OF KATE AND HER BOSS Kate’s boss, Nelson, left for a week vacation in the Bahamas during a particularly busy time.  When Nelson returned, he started to insult Kate because she and the rest of her team did not complete all that he had expected.  Nelson’s tone of voice began to infuriate Kate. Rather than exploding, she had a…

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Conflicts and Frustration

Please consider the following parable: THE MARTY AND LENA PARABLE Marty got stuck at work.  He calls his girlfriend, Lena, to let her know he’s going to be late for their date.  When Marty finally arrives, it’s apparent that Lena has a conflict with him.  That is, she desires he be on time.  When Marty arrived late this interfered with this desire.  She believes Marty…

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DIG for the Conflict

To become a master at dealing with disrespectful acts, an important skill to learn is to identify the reason you are being treated this way.  In future blogs, I will discuss a total of eight reasons.  Today we’ll focus just on one of them. Oftentimes the reason for the insulting behavior is that the insulter has a conflict with you. If you can quickly identify…

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Introducing a Free Psychological/Social Intelligence Curriculum

As we interact with others, sometimes we find someone treating us disrespectfully. For example, someone might shout at us words like, “You’re a jerk!” or “You’re a piece of trash!” It’s no secret that when we are treated disrespectfully, we may have feelings of anguish and be moved to tears. Or we may explode in anger. To deal with these rough feelings it often helps to…

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